January 11th, 2008

Jan Slota devises plan to defend Slovakia from turul birds

From the “you couldn’t make this up if you tried” file comes word that Jan Slota, the Slovak politician known dually for his Hungarophobia and heavy drinking, (which are usually related), has proposed that a giant patriarchal (double) cross be erected on the Hungarian-Slovak border to scare away the Hungarian turul birds, an MTI report at Index.hu stated. If that makes little sense and you’re contemplating reading that last sentence back, don’t bother, it will read just as bizarre as it did the first time around.

Slota recently participated in the dedication of one such cross in Csörgőn (Cerhov) after its wooden forerunner couldn’t stand up to the elements. The patriarchal cross features prominently in the Slovakian coat of arms, which looks very suspiciously like the right side of the Hungarian coat of arms, save that the hills in Slovakia are apparently a dark blue as opposed to a more natural green.

Slota would like to see these crosses erected all along the border, and is miffed that some local governments led by Hungarian-speaking Slovaks Hungarians have resisted his demands. As stated, the crosses are meant “to scare away the stupid Hungarian turul birds flying over Slovakia.” In that respect, the crosses have been a huge success in keeping turul birds out of Slovakian airspace, most likely because the birds, if not mythological, are long extinct, and are today, at best, imaginary.

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